Monday, December 08, 2008

Wedding Thoughts

It's taken us almost 3 months to get the first step of our wedding "planning" done and since I have had a lot of time to think about weddings, it has just made me more annoyed by some aspects of society and gender roles.  These don't really apply to us, but the more I read about other people's stories, the more it makes me wonder.
For example, why is it the "bride's day"?  A wedding is about two people joining together, and joining their families together, so why is it "her" day?  It should be "their" day or "our" day, not "her" day.  He should be just as much a part of it as anyone else.
Why should it be the bride doing all the wedding planning?  I can understand if that's the choice you make as a couple, but why is it assumed that the bride will do all the work and that the groom only has to help out if he chooses and/or if he has the time?
I'm not even going near the name issue.  I think it's a personal choice and people should do what they want to do, but I don't understand why some men pressure their future wives to change their name.  Why does the woman have to change her name?  Why not the man?  Why not both?  I understand that it's "tradition" but I don't like the expectation that a change will automatically happen.  If a woman chooses to take her husband's name, I think that's fine, but she shouldn't be forced or bullied or guilted into it. 
Anyway, enough ranting.  Back to work.

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