Monday, February 07, 2005

Five AM

It's 5 am and I'm wide awake. This is not good. Very very not good. Although I am writing. So I guess that's good.

Maybe I shouldn't have made that resolution earlier this month to go to sleep by 1 am daily. It's only been five nights since then, but I think I've only kept to it once and just barely. It feels like I made the resolution weeks ago, so when I went back to look for the post, I was shocked that it was from last week.

Time passes in such an odd manner when you're engulfed by a paper or a big exam. Every day feels like a week, and your body is proof of that level of exhaustion. Things that happened only a few days ago seem like a distant memory. Every day flows into the next without much meaningful division, since you're really doing the same thing day after day, hour after hour. Monday looks a lot like Saturday and you forget that there's other things you're supposed to be doing. I keep hearing promos for 24 on the radio while I'm working, but I feel like I haven't watched an episode in weeks when the last one was on not even a week ago. I also feel like I've been outlining and writing this paper for weeks and weeks and weeks when it... really hasn't been as long as it feels.

But it's after 5 am now, and somehow I'm wide awake. I was so tired and exhausted earlier in the day and went through a distracted spell a couple of hours ago when I got nothing done. My brain's operating now, but I really wish I were sleeping instead. Alertness is very important for tomorrow...

No comments: